Parenting Causes High Stress and Clinical Depression

While parenthood brings immense amounts of joy, pride, personal growth and other good things to those with children, it can also bring a lot of challenges, and researchers are finding that these challenges can take a toll. A parenting stress study by Florida State University professor Robin Simon and Vanderbilt University's Ranae Evenson found that parents have significantly higher levels of depression than adults who do not have children.

Here are some of the highlights of the study’s findings:

Higher Risk Factors

The study found that certain types of parents have higher levels of depression than other parents. Those who exhibited more symptoms of depression included:

• Parents of adult children living at home


• Parents of adult children not living at home


• Parents who do not have custody of their minor children

Lower Risk Factors

Those who exhibited the least depressive symptoms included:

• Parents living with minor biological children


• Parents living with minor adopted children


• Parents living with minor stepchildren.

(These findings were surprising, as it was assumed that these parents experience the greatest amounts of stress.)

The Marriage Buffer

Married parents also have fewer symptoms than those who were unmarried.

Both men and women were found to be equally effected by depression, a finding that actually shocked researchers, as it was inconsistent with previous studies and contradicts the historically held assumption that parenthood affects women more.

All Parents Are At Greater Risk

There is no category of parent, among all those listed above, who experienced lower levels of depression than non-parents, which researchers found surprising, especially because other adult roles, like being married and employed, are linked with greater levels of emotional well-being.

Lifelong Effects

Also surprising was the finding that these symptoms don’t go away when the kids grow up and move out of the house! Researchers believe that this is because parents still worry about their children and how they’re getting along in the world throughout their lives, from the time they’re colicky infants and tantrum-prone toddlers to the days when they’re worried about promotions at work and marital problems of their own.

What's Behind This?

The researchers believe that this is because parents have more to worry about than other people do. We worry about our children’s well-being all throughout their lives, from the time that they’re tiny and dealing with colic, teething and tantrums, to the time they’re dealing with finding jobs and partners and having kids of their own. It’s not that parents don’t enjoy their children or their roles, but the emotional toll of parenting can be high, partially because parents in the United States are often relatively socially isolated and don’t always have support from the community or even their extended family.

"It's how we do parenting in this society," Simon said. "We do it in a very isolated way and the onus is on us as individuals to get it right. Our successes are our own, but so are our failures. It's emotionally draining."

Something that may be additionally difficult for parents is that people don’t always talk about the difficulties of parenting or realize how much support is needed. This study can help parents see that they are taking on a role that’s challenging as well as rewarding, validate feelings that they might be having, and encourage them to seek social support and take care of themselves.

"Parents should know they are not alone; other people are feeling this way, too," she said. "This is a really difficult role, but we romanticize it in American culture. Parenthood is not the way it is in TV commercials."

New Parents at Risk

While the report, offered before, proposed that the parents with minor biological children are in relatively low risk of depression, the research, which tracked nearly 87,000 families in the United Kingdom between 1993 and 2007, found an opposite - the highest risk for depression occurred in the first years after a child’s birth.

Overall, 39 percent of mothers and 21 percent of fathers had experienced an episode of depression during the first 12 years of their child’s life. After the first year of parenting, a mother’s risk for depression dropped by half, while experienced fathers faced only about a quarter of the depression risk compared with new fathers. Although depression risk for both parents dropped considerably in the second year, it remained steady through a child’s 12th year.

Parents who had an earlier history of depression, who had children at a relatively young age or who had lower incomes were at highest risk for a depressive episode during their parenting years, according to the study, published online in The Archives of Pediatrics and Adolescent Medicine.

Parenting as Pure Joy?

Michael Lewis, professor of pediatrics and psychiatry and director of the Institute for the Study of Child Development at the Robert Wood Johnson Medical School in New Brunswick, N.J., says that the idea of parenthood as pure joy "was always a bit of a wonderful myth."

Over the last 150 years, he said, children have moved from being an economic advantage to an economic burden in the United States. We used to be able to send children to work in the fields; older kids tended to the babies. When not pressed into service, they mostly stayed out of the way.

With the advent of Dr. Spock, the parenting industry, obligatory music and soccer lessons and a colossal marketplace that propels kids to desire and parents to guilt, children have become the center of the household.

Meredith Small, a Cornell University anthropologist and author of "Kids: How Biology and Culture Shape the Way We Raise Our Children," sees cultural forces conspiring to make life lousy for parents.

"Western culture is the worst place to be if you want to be a parent," she says. "If you look at any other culture, people would think that this is nutty."

She said parents have never been as alone as they are in the United States today. In places like India, lots of people sleep in one big house. When the baby wakes up at 2 a.m., six people are available to help. Higher birth rates mean there are older children to take care of the younger ones. Worldwide, she says, 90 percent of child care is done by other children.

Even in many European countries, things are better; working mothers -- and sometimes fathers -- are paid a portion of their salaries to stay home during the first year or more with their young children. Parents get six weeks of vacation and extra time off to take care of sick kids. Good child care is subsidized by the government. College and graduate schools are paid for by the government.

Here, Small said, nuclear families aren't large enough. "Parents are tired, they are overworked, they are extended, they are irritated and they've got nobody to help them."

How to Manage Parenting Stress?

So short of sending the kids back into the fields, having more babies, inviting the neighbors to live with us or charging the kids rent, what's an overwhelmed parent to do?

Family therapist Neil Bernstein, who has offices in the District and Virginia, offers this simple advice: "Get a life."

For the record, he doesn't necessarily accept the study's conclusion that people with children are more depressed. Still, "What parents need to know and should take away from this is that it's important to look after your own mental health, not to live vicariously through your child," he said.

People should have their own interests and look after their relationships the same way they look after their children. And if it all seems too overwhelming, it's worth seeking help from a professional.

"Being a good parent does not mean being totally absorbed in your children," he said.

Sources and Additional Information:

http://stress.about.com/od/parentsunderstress/a/depressionrents.htm

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/01/02/AR2006010201513.html

http://www.parents-in-a-pickle.com/parenting-and-depression.html

http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/09/08/new-parents-at-risk-for-depression/

History of Research on Clinical Depression

Historical Background

Descriptions of depression and depression-related mental disorders date back to antiquity (Summerian and Egyptian documents date back to 2600 BC). However, it was Hippocrates (460–370 BC) and his disciples who first studied these conditions systematically and introduced the term ‘‘melancholia’’ to describe the symptoms and to provide a physiological explanation of their origin. Hippocrates described a syndrome of melancholia as a distinct disease with particular mental and physical symptoms; he characterized all "fears and despondencies, if they last a long time" as being symptomatic of the ailment.  It was a similar but far broader concept than today's depression; prominence was given to a clustering of the symptoms of sadness, dejection, and despondency, and, often, fear, anger, delusions and obsessions were included.

The Hippocratic School attempted to link the balance of the postulated four humors (blood, yellow bile, black bile and phlegm) with the temperament and personality, and the latter two with the propensity to  develop  one  of  the  four  diseases  (mania,  melancholia,  phrenitis  and paranoia). It is interesting that Hippocrates considered symptom duration as a diagnostic criterion for melancholia by stating in one of his aphorisms (the 23rd) that ‘‘if sorrow persists, then it is melancholia’’.

Subsequent eminent authors of antiquity (Aretaeus of Capadokia, Galen and others) continued using the term melancholia and elaborated further on its symptomatology, its causation and its delineation from related disorders. The essentials of the traditional views on melancholia were retained during the middle ages and long after. The publication of Robert Burton’s Anatomy of Melancholy in 1621, in addition to presenting an excellent description of a sufferer’s feelings, provided an informative review of the prevailing concepts on the nature of the illness at the time.

Influenced by Greek and Roman texts, physicians in the Persian and then the Muslim world developed ideas about melancholia during the Islamic Golden Age. Ishaq ibn Imran (d. 908) combined the concepts of melancholia and phrenitis. The 11th century Persian physician Avicenna described melancholia as a depressive type of mood disorder in which the person may become suspicious and develop certain types of phobias. His work, The Canon of Medicine, became the standard of medical thinking in Europe alongside those of Hippocrates and Galen.  Moral and spiritual theories also prevailed, and in the Christian environment of medieval Europe, a malaise called acedia (sloth or absence of caring) was identified, involving low spirits and lethargy typically linked to isolation.

The term depression itself was derived from the Latin verb deprimere, "to press down". From the 14th century, "to depress" meant to subjugate or to bring down in spirits. It was used in 1665 in English author Richard Baker's Chronicle to refer to someone having "a great depression of spirit", and by English author Samuel Johnson in a similar sense in 1753. The term also came in to use in physiology and economics. An early usage referring to a psychiatric symptom was by French psychiatrist Louis Delasiauve in 1856, and by the 1860s it was appearing in medical dictionaries to refer to a physiological and metaphorical lowering of emotional function. Since Aristotle, melancholia had been associated with men of learning and intellectual brilliance, a hazard of contemplation and creativity. The newer concept abandoned these associations and through the 19th century, became more associated with women.

The term ‘‘melancholia’’ survived as the only specifier of morbid mood and disposition until Kraepelin, at the end of the nineteenth century, introduced the term ‘‘manic-depression’’ to separate nosologically mood disorders from dementia praecox, known after Bleuler as schizophrenia.

Sigmund Freud likened the state of melancholia to mourning in his 1917 paper Mourning and Melancholia. He theorized that objective loss, such as the loss of a valued relationship through death or a romantic break-up, results in subjective loss as well; the depressed individual has identified with the object of affection through an unconscious, narcissistic process called the libidinal cathexis of the ego. Such loss results in severe melancholic symptoms more profound than mourning; not only is the outside world viewed negatively, but the ego itself is compromised. The patient's decline of self-perception is revealed in his belief of his own blame, inferiority, and unworthiness.  He also emphasized early life experiences as a predisposing factor.  

Meyer put forward a mixed social and biological framework emphasizing reactions in the context of an individual's life, and argued that the term depression should be used instead of melancholia.  The first version of the DSM (DSM-I, 1952) contained depressive reaction and the DSM-II (1968) depressive neurosis, defined as an excessive reaction to internal conflict or an identifiable event, and also included a depressive type of manic-depressive psychosis within Major affective disorders.

Historical Approaches to the Depression Treatment

The ancient scientists did not possess the knowledge, equipment, and opportunity of the modern researchers, however, their therapeutic approach is interesting not just from historical perspectives. May be, the humanistic views, not contaminated by the modern civilization, have the core values, you can use in your daily life…

Early Egypt                       

Cause of Depression: Loss of Status or Money

Treatment: Talking it Out , Religion, Suicide is accepted

Old Testament 

Cause of Depression: Despair, Cognition 

Treatment: Faith

Aeschylus

Cause of Depression: Demons

Treatment: Exorcism

Socrates                             

Cause of Depression: Heaven – sent, Not shameful                                  

Treatment: None, A Blessing

Aristotle

Cause of Depression: Melancholia

Treatment: Music

Hippocrates                     

Cause of Depression: Melancholia, Natural and Medical Causes

Treatment: Abstinence excesses, Vegetable Diet, Exercise

Celsius

Cause of Depression: A Form of Madness

Treatment: Entertaining Stories, Diversion, Persuasion Therapy

Galen

Cause of Depression: Psychic functions of the brain affected

Treatment: Confrontation, Humor, Exercise

Sources and Additional Information:

Depressive Disorders by Mario Maj and Norman Sartoris

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Major_depressive_disorder

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_depression

http://www.bipolarworld.net/Bipolar%20Disorder/History/pharoah.html

Islam’s View on Clinical Depression

The Islamic system aims to create balance in a Muslim’s life, by putting life matters into perspective, rearranging priorities accordingly, and harmonizing all circles of relationships between the individual and his inner and outer environments:



“Seek the life to come by means of what God granted you, but do not neglect your rightful share in this world. Do good to others as God has done good to you. Do not seek to spread corruption in the land, for God does not love those who do this” (Quran, 28:77)

People feel depressed or sad when this harmonious emotional and hormonal equilibrium is disturbed, in which case Islam steps in, not to condemn the feeling, but to offer a solution for regaining psychological and mental balance.

Can a Muslim be Depressed?

To become Muslim, you submit your will to God alone and no one else, and you believe and trust that He will take good care of you, no matter what happens, as long as you keep your side of the relationship with Him. You admit your limitations as a human, so you go through life looking ahead positively, worrying only about what’s in your knowledge and ability as a human, and you leave the rest to God’s wisdom.

Existential concerns can cause serious distress as one tries to understand: why am I here, where am I going, what’s the point of living if I’m going to die anyway? As a Muslim, you get affected by life’s troubles and disturbing thoughts like everyone else, but you’re well equipped to deal with them because you have a clear roadmap of where you came from, where you’re going and why, so you have a head-start having this fundamental knowledge from its source. In other words, you’re resistant to existential emptiness, your focus is on taking control of your life to make the most of it according to the purpose it was given to you for, and you make decisions that won't cause you to feel worse in bad times.

Someone who feels completely lost and alone in the face of a crisis would be hopeless, helpless and depressed, but someone who constantly feels supported by a compassionate God who genuinely cares, who listens to desperate pleas, and who grants generous help, has a better chance of getting back on track much faster because there is a strong helping hand to reach for while dealing with life’s troubles.

Is Depression Condemned in Islam?

From a social viewpoint it can be said without any misgivings that a true Muslim can never suffer from the clinical depression. The answer lies in this fundamental understanding, which governs (or should govern), a Muslim’s life: his life with all its ups and downs is a trial.

“No affliction comes about but by Allah’s permission; and whoever believes in Allah, He guides aright his heart; and Allah is Knower of all things.”(Quran, 64:11)

Therefore for a Muslim, difficulties, suffering, failures and adversities are nothing but a test from Almighty God. Perhaps as vital for the continuation of life as is oxygen for breathing. It cannot be that life goes on at a relative level of poverty or affluence till the end. The crests and troughs of this wave of life have an implicit existence. Every rise is sooner or later followed by a fall.

However, Islam doesn’t require us to be superhuman. If one experiences negative feelings, he is encouraged to resist them with positive thoughts and actions if possible, or to seek professional help if the case is clinical, exactly like any other form of illness.

We’re required to take charge of our lives since we’re accountable for our deeds and decisions, both for ourselves and for others who will be affected. We’re not allowed to hate or harm ourselves; instead we’re taught dignity, self respect and protection; both as a right and a duty:

“And make not your own hands contribute to your destruction; but do good; for Allah loves those who do good.” (Quran, 2:195)

“Nor kill or destroy yourselves: for verily Allah has been to you Most Merciful!” (Quran, 4:29)

Self hatred results from low self esteem in reaction to feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness, or guilt. A Muslim feels dignified and honored because The Creator bestowed upon him special privileges:

“We have honored the children of Adam and carried them by land and sea. We have provided good sustenance for them and favored them specially above many of those We have created” (Quran, 17:70)

And even if you’ve committed the worst sins, you always have hope of God’s mercy:

“And never give up hope of Allah's soothing Mercy: truly no one despairs of Allah's soothing Mercy, except those who have no faith.” (Quran, 12:87)

There is no place for despair because you have confidence in knowing that it’s God Himself who is in charge of everything, the All Seeing, All Knowing, and All Fair and Wise God:

“And for those who fear Allah, He always prepares a way out, and He provides for him from sources he never could imagine. And if anyone puts his trust in Allah, sufficient is Allah for him. For Allah will surely accomplish His purpose: verily, for all things has Allah appointed a due proportion.” (Quran, 65: 2-3)

You’re certain there is no impossible situation which has no solution:

“So, verily, with every difficulty, there is relief: Verily, with every difficulty there is relief.” (Quran, 94: 5-6)

You also have a simple and effective prescription against transient grief and anxiety:

(O Allah, I am Your slave, son of Your slave, son of Your female slave, my forelock is in Your hand, Your command over me is forever executed and Your decree over me is just. I ask You by every Name belonging to You which You named Yourself with, or revealed in Your Book, or You taught to any of Your creation, or You have preserved in the knowledge of the unseen with You, that You make the Qur’an the life of my heart and the light of my breast, and a departure for my sorrow and a release for my anxiety)’

The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: “No person suffers any anxiety or grief, and says (this supplication) but Allah will take away his sorrow and grief, and give him in their stead joy.”

Living with Depression

Many Muslim scholars have given us tips on how to deal with depression and guidelines on how we can renew our spiritual life. The Medicine of the Prophet recommends (and explains) these steps for those needing a spiritual cure for depression:

Acknowledge that God is free from injustice and that He would not cause any hardships without a reason. Confess that any imperfection and failure are one's own. Putting the blame on others is worthless. "Everything good that happens to you (O Man) is from God; everything bad that happens to you is from your own actions" (Quran, 4:79).  

Solicit God's help through prayer and supplication. Rather than asking, "Remove me from this despair (as if you are a victim), instead ask, "Help me find the source of this despair so it can be removed and I may be a better person." Ibn Abass narrated that God's messenger said, "When one is overwhelmed with worries or dispiritedness, one should oft-recite: There is no will or power except Allah."

Confirm your dependence on Allah and that you move according to divine plan. "And if God touches thee with affliction, none can remove it but He: if He touches thee with happiness, He has power over all things" (Quran, 6:17).

Strive to live according to the Quran and Hadith every moment of every day - not just during in prayers or while in the mosque.

Ask forgiveness for your sins and repent your wrongdoing. A Hadith says to recite, "Lord, I seek refuge in You from distress and cowardice. I seek refuge from weakness and procrastination, from stinginess and cowardice. I seek refuge in You from indebtedness and from subjugation to people's inequity."

25 Ways to Deal with Stress and Anxiety (by Abdul Malik Mujahid)

Stress is life. Stress is anything that causes mental, physical, or spiritual tension. There is no running away from it. All that matters is how you deal with it. This article does not deal with the factors of stress, anxiety, and depression, nor is it a clinical advice. If you feel depressed, you are not alone. It has been estimated that 75 to 90 percent of all visits to primary care physicians in America are for stress-related problems. This is why it is wise to consult a doctor if you are having physical symptoms of stress. However, here are some tips that can help from a spiritual perspective. Please send us your feedback so that we can improve this article Insha Allah.



Torture. Beatings. Loss of property. The death of loved ones. These were just some of the enormous challenges the Muslims of Makkah faced in the seventh century following their acceptance of Islam in fiercely tribal and polytheistic Makkah.



Detention. Harassment. Beatings. Discrimination. Loss of Job. Profiling. Hate Crimes. Constant media attention. Surveillance. These are just some of the challenges Muslims in America today face, post-9/11. Like our predecessors in Makkah, we have begun to face great stress, anxiety, and pressure, more than ever in our recent history on this continent, although Muslims who were brought here as slaves faced worse than what we can even imagine.



1. Ask Him. He Listens: Dua



Turn each anxiety, each fear and each concern into a Dua (supplication). Look at it as another reason to submit to God and be in Sajdah (prostration), during which you are closest to Allah. God listens and already knows what is in your heart, but He wants you to ask Him for what you want. The Prophet said: Allah is angry with those who do not ask Him for anything (Tirmidhi).



The Prophet once said that in prayer, he would find rest and relief (Nasai). He would also regularly ask for God’s forgiveness and remain in prostration during prayer praising God (Tasbeeh) and asking for His forgiveness (Bukhari).



Allah wants you to be specific. The Prophet advised us to ask Allah for exactly what we want instead of making vague Duas. Dua is the essence of worship (the Prophet as quoted in Tirmidhi).



"Call on your Lord with humility and in private: for Allah loveth not those who trespass beyond bounds. Do not make mischief on the earth, after it hath been set in order, but call on Him with fear. And longing (in your hearts): for the mercy of Allah is (always) near to those who do good"  (Quran 7:55-56).



2. Tie your Camel: Do your Part



One day Prophet Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him, noticed a Bedouin leaving his camel without tying it. He asked the Bedouin, "Why don't you tie down your camel?" The Bedouin answered, "I put my trust in Allah." The Prophet then said, "Tie your camel first, then put your trust in Allah" (Tirmidhi).



Muslims must never become fatalistic. Although we know only Allah is in control and that He has decreed all things, we are each responsible for making the right choices and doing the right thing in all situations of our lives. We must take action (link to planning articles on SV). We must work to alleviate the hardships we, our families and our communities face.



Ask yourself the following questions if you are worried about the state of the world: are you part of the peace movement? Is your Masjid part of the peace movement? Are you part of an interfaith group with an agenda of peace and justice? Are you working with a group fighting discrimination? If your answer is no, it is time that you sat down to plan your share of time and money in finding solutions to the problems you face. "Verily Allah does not change men’s condition unless they change their inner selves" (Quran 13: 11).



Turn each worry into a Dua and each Dua into an action plan. That will show your commitment to your request and will focus your energy in the right direction.



3. Remember that human responsibility is limited



While we need to carry out our duty to the best of our abilities, always remember that you don't control the outcome of events. Even the Prophets did not control the outcome of their efforts. Some were successful, others were not. Once you have done your duty, leave the results to Allah. Regardless of the results of your efforts, you will be rewarded for the part you have played.



However, never underestimate your abilities. Understand the concept of Barakah (blessings from Allah) and remember that Allah can and Insha Allah will expand them if you are sincerely exerting your energies for the right path.



4. Leave the world behind you five times a day



Use the five daily prayers as a means to become more Hereafter-oriented and less attached to this temporary world. Start distancing yourself as soon as you hear Adhan, the call to prayer. When you perform Wudu, keep repeating Shahada, the declaration of faith, as water drops slip down your face, hands, arms, and hair. When you stand ready to pray, mentally prepare yourself to leave this world and all of its worries and stresses behind you.



Of course, Shaytan will try to distract you during prayer. But whenever this happens, go back and remember Allah. The more you return, the more Allah will reward you for it. Also, make sure your Sajdas (prostrations) are talking Sajdas, in which you are really connecting to God and seeking His Mercy, praising Him, and asking His forgiveness.



5. Seek help through Sabr



Seek help through Sabr and Salat (Quran 2:45). This instruction from Allah provides us with two critical tools that can ease our worries and pain. Patience and prayer are two oft-neglected stress busters. Sabr is often translated as patience but it is not just that. It includes self-control, perseverance, endurance, and a focused struggle to achieve one’s goal. Unlike patience, which implies resignation, the concept of Sabr includes a duty to remain steadfast to achieve your goals despite all odds.



Being patient gives us control in situations where we feel we have little or no control. ‘We cannot control what happens to us but we can control our reaction to our circumstances’ is the mantra of many modern-day self-help books. Patience helps us keep our mind and attitude towards our difficulties in check.



6. Excuse Me! You are Not Running the World, He is.



It is important to remind ourselves that we don’t control all the variables in the world. God does. He is the Wise, the All-Knowing. Sometimes our limited human faculties are not able to comprehend His wisdom behind what happens to us and to others, but knowing that He is in control and that as human beings we submit to His Will, enriches our humanity and enhances our obedience (Uboodiah in Arabic) towards him. Read the story of the encounter of Moses with the mysteries behind God’s decision (Quran: 18:60-82). Familiarize yourself with God's 99 Names, which are also known as His Attributes. It is a powerful way of knowing Him.



"God-there is no deity save Him, the Ever-Living, the Self-Subsistent Fount of All being. Neither slumber overtakes Him, nor sleep. His is all that is in the heavens and all that is on earth. Who is there that could intercede with Him, unless it be by His leave? He knows all that lies open before men and all that is hidden from them, whereas they cannot attain to aught of His knowledge save that which He wills them to attain. His eternal power overspreads the heavens and the earth, and their upholding wearies Him not. And He alone is truly exalted, tremendous." (Quran,  2:255).



The Prophet recommended reading this verse, known as Ayat al kursi, after each prayer, Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him. Once Ali, may Allah be pleased with him, approached the Prophet during a difficult time and he found the Prophet in Sajda, where he kept repeating "Ya Hayy Ya Qayyum", words which are part of this verse.



7. Birds Don’t Carry their Food



Allah is al Razzaq (the Provider). "How many are the creatures that carry not their own sustenance? It is Allah Who feeds them and you, for He hears and knows all things (Quran 29:60)." By reminding yourself that He is the Provider, you will remember that getting a job or providing for your family in these economically and politically challenging times, when Muslims are often the last to be hired and the first to be fired, is in God’s Hands, not yours. As Allah says in the Quran: "And He provides for him from (sources) he never could imagine. And if anyone puts his trust in Allah, sufficient is (Allah) for him. For Allah will surely accomplish His purpose. Verily, for all things has Allah appointed a due proportion (Quran, 65:3).



8. God controls Life and Death



If you fear for your physical safety and security, remember that only Allah gives life and takes it back and, that He has appointed the time for it. No one can harm you except if Allah wills. As He says in the Quran: "Wherever you are, death will find you out, even if you are in towers built up strong and high!" (Quran,  4:78).



9. Remember that life is short



It's easy to get caught up in our own stress and anxiety. However, if we remember that our life is short and temporary, and that the everlasting life is in the Hereafter, this will put our worries in perspective.



This belief in the transitory nature of the life of this world reminds us that whatever difficulties, trials, anxieties, and grief we suffer in this world are, Insha Allah, something we will only experience for a short period of time. And more importantly, if we handle these tests with patience, Allah will reward us for it.



10. Do Zikr, Allah, Allah!



"… without doubt in the remembrance (Zikr) of Allah do hearts find tranquility" (Quran 13:28).



If you commute, use your time in Zikr. Pick any Tasbeeh and do that instead of listening to the radio or reading the newspaper. Maybe you can divide it up between Zikr and planning. Personally, I recite the Tasbeeh of "Subhana Allahe wa be hamdihi, subhan Allahil Azeem" 100 times as I drive. The Prophet taught us these two short phrases which are easy to say but will weigh heavy on our scale of good deeds in the Hereafter.



When your heart feels heavy with stress or grief, remember Allah and surround yourself with His Zikr. Zikr refers to all forms of the remembrance of Allah, including Salat, Tasbeeh, Tahmeed, Tahleel, making supplication (Dua), and reading Quran.



"And your Lord says: ‘Call on Me; I will answer your (prayer)…" (Quran,  40:60)



By remembering Allah in the way He has taught us to, we are more likely to gain acceptance of our prayers and His Mercy in times of difficulty. We are communicating with the only One Who not only Hears and Knows all, but Who can change our situation and give us the patience to deal with our difficulties.



"Remember Me, and I shall remember you; be grateful to Me, and deny Me not" (Quran, 2:152).



11. Relying on Allah: Tawakkul



When you awaken in the morning, thank Allah for giving you life after that short death called sleep. When you step out of your home, say 'in Your Name Allah, I put my trust in Allah, and there is no power or force except with Allah' (Bismillahi Tawakal to al Allah wa la hawla wa la quwwata illa billah). At night, remember Allah, with His praises on your lips.



Once you have established a plan you intend to follow through on to deal with a specific issue or problem in your life, put your trust in the most Wise and the All-Knowing. "When you have taken a decision, put your trust in Allah" (Quran, 3: 159).



Rely on Allah by constantly remembering Him throughout your day. When you lay down to sleep, remember that sleep is death. That is why one of the recommended supplications before going to sleep is "with Your (Allah's) Name I die and become alive".



12. Connect with other human beings



You are not alone. Muslims are not alone. We are not suffering in silence. There are millions of good people who are not Muslim with beautiful hearts and minds. These are people who have supported us, individually and collectively, post-9/11, by checking up on us and making sure we are safe. These are individuals and organizations who have spoken up in defense of Muslims as we endured harassment and discrimination.



We must think of them, talk to them, connect with them, and pray for them. Through our connections, we will break the chain of isolation that leads to depression and anxiety.



13. Compare your dining table with that of those who don't have as much as you do



The Prophet said: Whenever you see someone better than you in wealth, face or figure, you should look at someone who is inferior to you in these respects (so that you may thank Allah for His blessings) (Bukhari, Muslim).



Next time you sit down to eat, eye the table carefully. Check out the selection of food, the quality, the taste, the quantity, and then think of the millions of others who don't have even half as much. The Prophet's Hadith reminds us of this so that we can appreciate and thank God for all that we have.



Also remember that the Prophet only encouraged us to compare ourselves to others in two respects: in our Islamic knowledge and level of belief in God (Deen). In these two areas, we should compare ourselves with those who have more than what we do.



14. Say it Loud: Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar: Takbirat & Adhan



Find a corner of a lake, go out in the wilderness, or even stand on your lawn at your home and call the Adhan with your heart. While driving, instead of listening to the same news over and over again, say Allahu Akbar as loudly as you can or as softly as you want, based on your mood. Year ago, I remember calling Adhan on a Lake Michigan shore in Chicago after sunset as the water gushed against my knees. I was calling it for myself. There was no one else accept the waves after waves of water with their symphony. It was relaxing and meaningful. Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar.



15. Pray in congregation (Jamat)



Pray with other people instead of alone. If you can't pray all five prayers in congregation, at least find one or two prayers you can pray with others. If you are away, establish Jamat in your own family. During the Prophet's time, even though the Muslims endured great persecution, including physical beatings, they would sometimes meet on the side of a mountain or valley and tried to pray together. This is a great morale booster.



16. How is your Imam's Dua?



Does the Imam at your local mosque make Dua silently or out loud? Ask him to supplicate with the whole congregation. Suggest Duas for him to make. Ask him to make Dua for other people.



17. Work for the Unity of Muslims



Bringing Muslims together will not only help the Muslims, but it will also encourage you to focus your energies on something constructive versus zeroing in on and consistently fretting about difficulties you are going through.



Invite Muslims from other ethnic groups to your functions. Visit Masjids other than yours in your city. When you meet a Muslim leader, after thanking him for his efforts, ask him what he is doing for Muslim unity. Ask Imams to make Dua for this. These are just small ways you can help yourself and the Muslim community.



18. Sleep the way the Prophet slept



End your day on a positive note. Make Wudu, then think of your day. Thank Allah for all the good things you accomplished, like Zikr and Salat. Ask yourself what you did today to bring humanity together and what you did to help Muslims become servants of humanity. For everything positive, say Alhamdu lillah (Praise be to Allah). For everything negative say Astaghfirullah wa atoobo ilayk (I seek Allah's forgiveness and I turn to You [Allah]). Recite the last two chapters of the Quran, thinking and praying as you turn on your right side with your hand below your right cheek, the way the Prophet used to sleep. Then close your day with the name of Allah on your tongue. Insha Allah, you will have a good, restful night.



19. Begin the Day on a Positive Note



Get up early. Get up thanking God that He has given you another day. Alhamdu lillahil lazi ahyana bada ma amatana, wa ilaihin Nushoor (Praise be to Allah Who gave us life after death and unto Him will be the return). Invest in an audio tape driven alarm clock so you can get up to the melody of the Quran. Or Let Dawud Wharnsby's joyful notes put you in a good mood. Sing along if you like. Develop your to do list for the day if you didn't do it the night before. Begin with the name of Allah, with Whose name nothing in the heavens or the earth can hurt you. He is the Highest and the Greatest. (Bismillahillazi la yazurru maa ismihi shaiun fil arze wa la fis samae, wahuwal Alee ul Azeem). The Prophet used to say this after every Fajr and Maghrib prayers.



20. Avoid Media Overexposure: Switch from News to Books



Don't spend too much time checking out the news on the radio, television or internet. Spend more time reading good books and journals. When you listen to the persistent barrage of bad news, especially relating to Muslims nowadays, you feel not only depressed, but powerless. Cut down media time to reduce your stress and anxiety. It's important to know what's going on but not to an extent that it ruins your day or your mood.



21. Pray for Others to Heal Yourself.



The Prophet was always concerned about other people, Muslims and non-Muslims, and would regularly pray for them. Praying for others connects you with them and helps you understand their suffering. This in itself has a healing component to it. The Prophet has said that praying for someone who is not present increases love.



22. Make the Quran your Partner



Reading and listening to the Quran will help refresh our hearts and our minds. Recite it out loud or in a low voice. Listen to it in the car. When you are praying Nafl or extra prayers, pick it up and use it to recite portions of the Quran you are not as familiar with. Connecting to the Quran means connecting to God. Let it be a means to heal your heart of stress and worries. Invest in different recordings of the Quran and their translations.



"O humanity! There has come to you a direction from your Lord and a cure for all [the ills] in men’s hearts - and for those who believe, a Guidance and a Mercy" (Quran, 10:57).



23. Be thankful to Allah



"If you are grateful, I will give you more" (Quran, 14:7).



Counting our blessings helps us not only be grateful for what we have, but it also reminds us that we are so much better off than millions of others, whether that is in terms of our health, family, financial situation, or other aspects of our life. And being grateful for all we have helps us maintain a positive attitude in the face of worries and challenges we are facing almost daily.



24. Ideals: One step at a time



Ideals are wonderful things to pursue. But do that gradually. Think, prioritize, plan, and move forward. One step at a time.



25. Efforts not Results Count in the Eyes of Allah



Our success depends on our sincere efforts to the best of our abilities. It is the mercy of Allah that He does not demand results, Alhamdu lillah. He is happy if He finds us making our best sincere effort. Thank you Allah!

Sources and Additional Information:

http://www.balancedleader.net/psychology/depressed.html

http://www.scribd.com/doc/6134539/Depression-Islamic-view

http://forum.challengeyoursoul.com/forum/topic3464.html

http://en.allexperts.com/q/Islam-947/2008/6/cure-4-depression-islam.htm

Could Eating A Vegan Diet Cause Depression?

Eat healthy – that is the slogan you hear everywhere, and if you follow-up this popular appeal, it might definitely help you with multiple physical and mental health issues. But what is healthy? Some specialists consider healthy diet as well balanced diet, other recommend strictly vegetarian or vegan diets. But that is just the beginning of the healthy diets definition list. You may find completely well-rounded scientific explanations on the usefulness of high-protein and other special diets. Who is right, and who is wrong? I guess, one size does not fit all. What may be a good idea for one individual, might be absolutely bad idea for another.

In this post we will review the concept that vegan diet might lead to the clinical depression due to the lack of certain food-related components, which are not received by the strictly restricted food consumption.

In general, a vegan diet might or might not cause depression, depending on the individual characteristics of the person and how it is applied. It is, however, well known that transitioning to a vegan diet most likely will cause all sorts of physical and emotional symptoms while your body gets used to it, just like transitioning to any new diet or even a new altitude or lifestyle can. These symptoms generally pass after a few weeks. While that is understandable and acceptable, a vegan diet can put you at risk for certain nutritional deficits if you are not careful about meeting your nutritional needs, specifically protein, iron and B12, with B12 being the most worrisome.

There is increasing evidence that diet may play a causative role in some cases of depression. The food production in industrialized societies uses intensive farming and processing techniques. This can contribute to depleted levels of omega 3 fatty acids, certain amino acids and other essential nutrients in the food we eat. Also over time our food choices and preferences have changed, which has led to a skewed ratio of fats in out diet.

Omega 3 is an important essential fats for the body. Its deficiency has been linked to depression, anxiety, aggressiveness and even insomnia. In some studies it was observed that patients suffering from depression have lower levels of omega-3 fatty acids in their cell membranes. More startlingly, its deficiency worsens the conditions of ADHD children considerably. Research has shown that patients with bipolar depression who increased their consumption of foods containing omega 3 showed remarkable improvement in mood, which supports the role of omega 3 fatty acids in the treatment of depression .

Omega 3 is required in the diet and cannot be made within the body. Foods rich in omega 3 include oily fish such as salmon and mackerel, flaxseeds walnuts, olive oil, pumpkin seeds. Ensuring 2-3 portions of oily fish per week should provide adequate omega 3 in your diet.

Amino acids are also not produced within the human body. Tryptophan is an amino acid which is converted into serotonin in the body and is a natural relaxant. This can be used in the treatment of depression to assist with a good night’s sleep, treat migraines and even boost the immune system. Deficiency in the essential amino acid Lysine may cause fatigue, irritability and a lack of concentration. Good sources of lysine include meat, chicken, and eggs and legumes.

Carbohydrates are important in the fight against depression. They help to release the chemical monoamine serotonin. This chemical is found in the brain and is a mood-enhancer. It induces sleep and brings on relaxation. Depression seems to stem from reduced serotonin in the brain. Hence the feeling of satisfaction as soon as a person eats a meal with carbohydrates. Increasing complex carbohydrates that are absorbed slowly such as brown rice, whole grain wheat, bran, fruits and vegetables may be important in the treatment of depression, as this will help ensure a steady supply of serotonin.

Depression can also be intensified or even caused by deficiencies of vitamins and minerals, like folate, B12 and vitamin C and magnesium. In a major study, a direct link between low folate levels and neuropsychiatry disorder was established. It has also been suggested that an increased intake of folate can help reduce the high levels of homocysteine often present during depression. Foods rich in folate and vitamin c include spinach, broccoli, tomato juice, kidney beans, lentils and asparagus and increasing amounts of these foods in the diet could be useful in the treatment of depression.

Vitamin B12 is found in animal products such as milk, meat, cheese and yogurt. Vegans and strict Vegetarians who do not drink milk products can be lacking in Vitamin B12. Elderly people often suffer from malabsorption of this vitamin due to a lack of acidity in the stomach (which assists in its digestion) and this can lead to mood disorders or even depression. Vitamin B12 is therefore a key vitamin to consider in supplementing for the treatment of depression. It takes a long time for B12 deficiency to show up, because your requirements are quite low and it stays in the body for a long time, so someone could be vegan for years before they have problems. The best vegan source for this nutrient is nutritional yeast. Many vegetarians/vegans make the mistake of eating refined carbohydrates. Avoid these as much as you can; they deplete the body of B vitamins, which can make you feel depressed/anxious. Make sure you get enough protein, too–the brain needs it!

A deficiency of magnesium is sometimes associated with forms of depression. A diet rich in magnesium such as nuts and grains, spinach, and meat may be beneficial in alleviating the symptoms of depression.

The most common mineral deficiencies in vegetarians are related to poor iron intake. Iron is a mineral that comprises hemoglobin, necessary for oxygenating the blood. A diet that does not include animal products requires higher percentages of daily intake from alternative sources. If you are not getting enough iron through dried beans and dark leafy green vegetables every day, you can develop an iron deficiency, which results in fatigue, depressive symptoms and anemia. These generally go away as soon as your iron is back on track. You can definitely prevent this by eating lots of beans, leafy greens and whole grains.

Protein deficiencies can also cause depression. For example, long term veganism leads to a lack of Tryptophan in the diet. Tryptophan is an amino acid found only in animal protein, and is the precursor to the neurotransmitter Seratonin, which is directly responsible for happiness.

 Too many simple carbohydrates can also cause depression, especially when protein is low. Try leafy greens such as collards (calcium and magnesium are essential).

While vegans generally report good overall health, some staples in their diet are common allergens. For example, peanuts, tree nuts, soybeans and wheat are repeat offenders that cause an array of symptoms from leaky gut syndrome to mental disturbances such as depression. When the body suspects a foreign antigen is present, it quickly responds via the immune system. Over an extended period of being exposed to an allergy, the body remains in attack mode, depleting many other resources and increasing the likelihood of autoimmune disease. Autoimmune disease is both a cause and effect of depression.

Candida, or candida overgrowth, is common in the vegetarian diet. This is due to the high consumption of fruit and fruit juice, pasta, breads, honey and similar products laden with parasites, bacteria or yeasts. The National Candida Center reports that a single yeast cell produces over 75 known toxins that act like poison in the human body and result in a weakened immune system. They impair the brain and central nervous system. Depressive symptoms are not uncommon, as the body simply cannot stave off multiple attacks.

Diet and depression may well have a cyclical relationship. Depression may be exacerbated by dietary deficiency in the first place and can go onto lead to a loss of appetite or apathy towards food and wellbeing. A dietary approach to the treatment of depression is by no means the whole answer but it could play an important role.

And most important, no matter what you eat, do not forget that health diet is only a part of the healthy lifestyle. You also need sun, exercise, friendship, therapy, and a spiritual practice such as meditation for best results.

Sources and Additional Information:

http://www.vegetarianvitaminsguide.com/vitamins-supplements/could-eating-a-vegan-diet-cause-a-chemical-imbalance-in-your-brain/

http://www.artificialgrassmasters.com/can-a-vegan-diet-cause-depression.html

http://rekindlingthereformation.com/H-deception_Nedley_depression_nutrition_food.html

http://www.livestrong.com/article/364101-depression-as-a-vegetarian/